Q: I started a business and it’s getting so busy that I’m having trouble doing it all by myself. A friend has offered to help and has suggested I hire him, but I’ve always heard hiring friends and family is a bad idea and should be avoided. Your thoughts?
A: When you own a small business, sooner or later you will be tempted to hire a close friend or family member. And it’s a very appealing thought. You already know and like this person, you get along great, you trust them with your life, there is no need for references, what could be better? Beware, those are the rose-colored glasses talking.
The reality is that running your own business is a stressful endeavor and working with friends and relatives will add an additional layer of emotional strain that could make everything more difficult.
Yes, sometimes it works well. There are many “mom and pop” small businesses where friends and family are getting along swimmingly. But in general, I don’t recommend it, and here’s why:
First, there’s the emotional drain. Talking to regular employees about missed deadlines, coming in late or not getting a raise can be uncomfortable. Now, imagine the same conversation with your best friend or your cousin Steve. See why you’ll be drained of precious energy by dealing with this drama? You may even make decisions that aren’t in the best interest of the business in order to avoid emotional conflict.
Second, there’s jeopardizing a relationship. Familial bonds or friendships might suffer irreparable damage if things go wrong or, worse, if you have to part ways.
However if you still want to try hiring a friend or relative, ask yourself these 3 questions:
Does this person have the skill-set (or experience, or education) that you are looking for and that your business needs? Guard against hiring someone simply because they are between jobs, or got laid off or you want to help them. There’s nothing wrong with all the above as long as they genuinely meet your needs.
Have you clarified expectations about performance, pay, confidentiality, role, and conduct?
Lastly, ask the overriding question: Are you willing to risk a close personal relationship over what takes place at work?
©Copyright Eva Del Rio
