Q:  Last week, you discussed three signs that tell a supervisor a new hire isn’t working out.  Well, I’m a new hire and I can’t tell whether I’m doing great or hanging by a thread because I’m not getting any feedback.    I’m fairly certain I don’t have an attendance  issue or “being unpleasant” issue but I do feel overwhelmed and unsure. Any advice on how to ask for feedback? Or should I assume no news is good news?

A: Don’t assume that.  Sometimes no news actually means bad news someone doesn’t want to give you.  So you’re instinct is right in wanting more information about your performance.  We’ll get to that.

But first, let me say that feeling overwhelmed is part of the normal new hire experience.

Whether it’s your first job out of college or changing jobs mid-career, starting a new job can make the most competent of us feel insecure.  A new job at a company with new procedures, new people, -having to learn new names and sometimes a new jargon that feels like a new language- can be overwhelming.

The best companies know this is a rocky time and prepare by having a new-hire onboarding plan which outlines training milestones and timeframes.  But other companies have the “sink or swim” training method, which means new hires get little feedback.  It sounds like that’s where you are.

So, here’s how you can find out where you stand:

Ask to meet with your manager to “check on my progress so far”.  Come well-prepared with your own self-assessment, this shows you’re professional and take your performance seriously. State where you think you are doing well and where you feel you need to improve.

Then ask for their assessment.  If they agree with you, great.  Plan to meet again to check on progress. You’ll know what you need to work on going forward, and you’ll gradually stop feeling overwhelmed.

If, however, they bring up constructive criticism or other issues that take you by surprise, simply listen with an open mind and don’t get defensive.

Afterwards you’ll have a choice:

Decide whether the feedback is valid and you agree this is the way forward and stay.

Or decide their expectations don’t align with yours and you are better off parting ways.

If you DO decide the latter, sooner is better.

©Copyright Eva Del Rio

Eva Del Rio is creator of HR Box™ – tools for small businesses and startups. Send questions to Eva@evadelrio.com